Seven. Proactivity and Something Else.

I know I have lots to say. So we'll see how concisely I can say it and if I can
remember everything to some extent. Clearly, according to the title, I've already
forgotten one thing. We'll see if it comes back.



Seven.

The old theory was as follows: the one you get along with, the one you're attracted to,
the one you connect with, the one you want to follow, the one with whom you have
chemistry, the one you admire, and the one who reflects you.


Seven is a good number.

The seven intelligences: musical, logical-mathematical, kinesthetic, spatial,
linguistic, interpersonal, and intrapersonal.

The new theory is this, and so far I'm up to six: physical, logical, mental, emotional,
spiritual, and social. Maybe number seven has something to do with communication?
...although I feel like that may fall under mental. Maybe.

Johnny Bunko has six principles. He should have seven. Personal Responsibility.





Anyway. Seven.

Physical
Logical
Mental
Emotional
Spiritual
Social
(Communication-al?)

I think this makes the most sense so far. It's broader than the Seven Reasons and
more detailed than the dichotomy of the one who treats you right vs. the one with
whom you have commonalities. Balance and Moderation. Clearly, there is overlap, but
to me, it is sensible overlap.

These things can be framed and prioritized in many different ways. They are more
open to personal perspective. The Seven Reasons was all my philosophy and was not
generalizable. The dichotomy is too simple. To some, differences in some areas may
be more acceptable than to others.

Physical includes attraction and maybe chemistry and other areas of physical fit.

Logical is what makes sense. Logical encapsulates most (all?) of the other areas.

Mental is thinking style, etc. Some may prefer more similarities; others, differences.

Emotional is more like the wavelength on which a person functions. Maybe. I know this
is specifically important to me, but I'm not quite sure how to conceptualize it.

Spiritual refers to a lot of things, all comprising a worldview perspective.

Social is a lot like wavelength, only with others, rather than individually.

(Communication-al?). Not sure. I just needed a seventh one. This could probably
dissolve into the other areas.



I want to see how these seven align with the Seven Reasons, but not right now.









PROACTIVITY.

Honestly, I am so mentally drained that I can't even communicate this clearly.

Essentially, to me, anything other than passivity is more acceptable than passivity.

Passivity is stagnant and stagnancy does not induce growth.

You can't grow sitting still.

The best alternative to passivity is proactivity. Institutional Resources and the
prevention of problems.

The other alternative to passivity is reactivity. Residual Resources and solutions to
problems.



Basically, this ties into the seventh Bunko principle of personal responsibility.

If something is wrong, if you are dissatisfied with something? Change it. React to it.
I don't even care if it's not a good reaction, just do SOMETHING. Don't sit still.
If you can't change it? Work around it, reconsider if it's truly important. Find a way.







Sorry this is maybe completely incoherent. Not in a good writing mentality right now.

I've failed to remember the something else. It'll come up again, I'm sure.

Marx, Mostly

Hi, friends. I've been reading lots of Marx lately. Three hours worth over the course
of yesterday, to be exact. ...and more to read over the weekend. Yesterday, I read
excerpts from The German Ideology and The Economic and Political Philosophies of 1844.

I read a section of The Communist Manifesto for my Intro to Socio class at HACC and
will be reading a longer portion for Tuesday (for Sociological Theory). My assignment
for HACC was simply to write a critical reaction paper. This paper, "Marx Missed Some
Things," should be archived here.

As I was even more enveloped in the depth of Marx's theories over the course of the
week, I at first felt that I disagreed more with Marx more than I had before. Later, I
felt completely mentally exhausted after reading original texts for three hours and
trying to retain as much as possible and I remedied this by watching some "Arrested
Development." Finally, after discussing our assigned reading in class today and
tying it to some things we mentioned in Methods later in the day, I once again feel
that Marx really was onto something. He did, indeed, miss some things due to some
vast logical leaps he made, but the general conflict he was addressing resonates with
so much of what I've been saying for so long. Marx missed some things in regards to
the fact that he blamed such issues on Capitalism, rather than on individuals.

Blaming the system is much like writing in the passive voice (which, by the way, is
becoming less and less accepted in scholarly research articles...we're back to I
statements, that is).

Blaming the individuals, if done with care and balance and moderation, can actually
give said individuals a great deal of freedom and responsibility. Instead of telling
a person that a negative situation is his or her fault, blaming the individual should
be done so that it sounds more like, "You can fix this."
This is called something, some term I can never quite remember. Attribution theory?
Blaming external circumstances removes the blame from the individual and also removes
autonomy from that same individual.
Blaming internal circumstances places the blame on the individual and also gives an
amount of autonomy back to that individual.

(Perhaps, here we should remember and keep in mind the "Serenity Prayer")






Blaming the individual returns autonomy and a certain kind of freedom. And, in all
honesty, after reading Marx for three hours and discussing him for another one and
a half, on top of thinking about his theories before and after the discussion; it
sounds like that's really all Marx wanted.

He describes that, in the Communist system, all individuals would have the freedom
to fish in the morning, hunt in the afternoon, and be a critical critic in the
evening (paraphrased), all the while NOT being pigeon-holed into any of those (or
other) titles.
Freedom and mobility - what Marx really wanted.



However, he missed some things. He had the right premise, the right idea, but he
landed in the wrong spot.

Speaking of that, this is also why I disagree with Hegel's theory of the dialectic.
Hegel proposes that there is some idea, a thesis, that is in tension with the opposite
idea, an antithesis. Through this tension, society will arrive at a synthesis. This
synthesis becomes the new thesis, which is in tension with its antithesis. Again, a
new idea will arise through synthesis and this process will continue until society
discovers Truth.
But, see, this doesn't do it for me because, a person can have the right premise
and the right idea, and through whatever logical or personal error, miss the mark.
Truth does not arise from such a natural process as that of the dialectic.





Anyway. Marx had the right idea, the right premise, but he landed in the wrong spot.

The greatest logical flaw that was apparent at least twice throughout all the original
text I read was this... Marx argued that the ability to labor (creatively and freely)
is what makes us human. He goes on to say that becoming laborers is also what strips
us of our humanness. While the distinction can be made that we cease to be human when
our labor ceases to be creative and free, we become simply as part of a machine, and
we become a commodity; there's a pretty significant gap in Marx's logical argument.

This process of losing the human essence, the species being, and become a simple
mode of production, an animal laborens, is what Marx refers to as alienation.

Alienation occurs because the joy is taken out of work (labor).

Marx blames this on Capitalism.

I do not.



Alienation occurs when a person is reduced to having some job that is not fulfilling.

This occurs because that person is expecting having some job, any job, will be
completely fulfilling.

(Oh, I've been talking about expectations vs. reality a LOT lately, haven't I?)

And this, my friends, ties back into EVERYTHING I've been saying for, oh, about the
past YEAR about core values.



A stupid little job (factory work, assembly line, cashier, gas station attendant, and
so on) probably will not be completely fulfilling. (I do agree with Marx that it is
especially difficult for assembly line work to bring fulfillment in regards to simple
productivity because a factory worker is so alienated and removed from both product
and the production design). However, almost all jobs will at least be fulfilling to
the extent that the worker is being productive. I believe that being productive is
a very important part of being human. This is why so many people experience post-
retirement depression and why the cycle of depression is so very difficult to stop.

However! Even though a stupid little job will not be completely satisfying, that does
not mean that an individual must be completely alienated. I realize that Marx was
criticizing a very different time in history, but I wonder what would have been
different had Marx taken this more metaphysical(?) bent?...





I've been writing for too long now and I fear that, if I continue in this same
manner, my thesis-conclusion will be blurred and muddied. So, sorry that this is
going to be short and blunt, but...





Alienation due to a stupid little job occurs when meaning is not found in a place
other than that mostly insignificant job.

Alienation can be avoided.

Alienation occurs when all meaning is wrapped up in and expected to be provided by
something that simply cannot provide all meaning.





Alienation due to a job will only occur when an individual expects that job to
provide some meaning that it simply cannot give.

I'm sorry if it's simplistic, but I believe that it works.









If you decide that you're not happy -- change your mind.

Personal Responsibility

I know I just posted a day or so ago, but I have time and I'm going to keep writing
while I have time. It feels too soon to post again, but I have more things to say and
I'm going to keep writing if I have more things to say.

On a side note, PDP is annoying in regards to the fact that it is very difficult to
learn and practice something if one is already skilled in that particular area. It
seems illogical to say, but if it's a skill that, to you, feels like second nature, it
is terribly painful and difficult to go through the time-consuming steps of a curriculum
designed to teach that skill that, to you, feels like second nature. In other words, it's
really difficult to slow down and think through a process that comes so easily.







Anyway.

Personal Responsibility

According to Dan Pink and The Adventures of Johnny Bunko, there are six keys to success:
1. There is no plan
2. Think strengths, not weaknesses
3. It's not about you
4. Persistence trumps talent
5. Make excellent mistakes
6. Leave an imprint

To me, the seventh Bunko principle could be: Be personally responsible.

Many things are within your control. Thus, to some extent, you are responsible for
them. Even if it is an area where other people or institutions have some influence,
if you are involved in such an area, you should take every liberty to be involved
and be responsible for how that area influences you (and your happiness!).

I'm being vague because the only example I can give will be overly obvious.

Essentially, you cannot blame an institution when you clearly had the time and
necessary resources available to avoid the issue that occurred. You certainly had the
opportunity to check and double-check and double-check again to make certain the the
institution had done its part. If you had, you would have seen the mistake, been able
to correct it, and avoided this entire mess.







I am so tired of so much.

Upcoming topic: The Seven Intelligences

Far Too Complicated

Social networking sites such as Facebook seem to be dissolving into something useful,
but altogether shallow. A Facebook user was once able to write a finite amount of prose
in regards to his or her likes and interests. Now, Facebook utilizes a different profile
design that forces users to limit themselves to the confines of "pages" that they can
"like." These strict and simple lists now compose the Likes and Interests Section,
where there was once a greater degree of personal expression.

When this profile change was made, Facebook automatically tried to strain and filter
my personal prose of expression into such a strict and simple list. This was not easy
for Facebook to do. When I realized this was about to happen, I copied my entire Likes
and Interests Section because, as a writer, I take everything I have created quite
seriously and consider it all to be a collection of linguistic works of art, whether
real writing, journal entries, blogs, school notes, or Facebook-related items.

These new Facebook confines are common across the vast sea of social networking sites
and I believe they are far too confining. They are far too confining and they will
end with negative consequences. Perhaps most likely latent (maybe!), but negative.




Anyway. I guess this mostly has to do with an idea that is common within areas of the
Social Sciences. I apologize that I do not recall the precise term for this, but I
had Gen Psych and Intro to Socio during the Fall semester of my Senior year. I feel
like that was a long time ago. Today, I shared my fear of not remembering the basics
of my concentrations with Dr. Hayes and she reassured me that it will not be a problem.
Anyway. There's a Social Science idea (due to my taking Gen Psych and Intro to Socio
at the same time, such ideas blend together and cross department lines) that suggests
people become what they are expected to be. I believe this is mostly Labeling Theory
and is a Sociological idea, but Psychologists probably have some similar idea.

Anyway. Social Networking profiles do not allow a person to express how deep he or
she truly is and, applying Labeling Theory, if a person is treated as shallow, simple,
and uncomplicated, that is what that person is likely to become.

As I began to realize this, I began to become disgusted with the idea of a strict and
simple list within my Likes and Interests section. In order to defend against this, I
deleted the entire section. My About Me section remains as in-depth as the word limit
will allow, but I added an opening sentence of: "I am much more complicated than this."
In all honesty, I would much rather boycott the whole philosophy of the social
networking system and delete my profile altogether, but I cannot emotional bring
myself to do so, due to my severe social interest in so many other people and desire
to be easily connected to their life events, even if those life events are watered
down by the limits of such a social networking site.



I have also been considering complexity in regards to my personality as I consider
the idea of a potential romantic relationship, so that I will be somewhat prepared
when such an opportunity presents itself. Lately, I have been feeling more and more
complex and I fear there may be no one to complement my kind of complexity or at
least understand it to the point of my satisfaction. I do realize that this sounds so
wholeheartedly arrogant, but necessity and preference is important to consider, as
long as one does not create an image of the ideal. Generally, considering personal
complexity has been quite disheartening. Perhaps I will conclude such a complementing
complexity is unlikely to exist; unlikely enough that it ceases to be a necessity.



I'm not going to go into this deeply at all, but what if the changes to social
networking sites in regards to the watering down and simplifying of profiles is NOT
latent and the negative consequences are actually completely intended? What if the
minds behind social networking sites want us to feel simple and shallow so that we
become as such?



That's all for now.

Upcoming Topic: Personal Responsibility/Independence (tied to Non-Complaining!)

This is Not the End

The chorus of The Bravery's song, This is Not the End, goes like this:

Not even earth can hold us
Not even life controls us
Not even the ground can keep us down
The memories in my head
Are just as real the time we spent
You'll always be close to me, my friend
This is not the end




In my own way, according to my circumstances, I feel like I understand this more now.

It's a matter of specificity when it comes to communicating such an ending event.

This is not THE end.

This is THIS end.









I feel myself becoming increasingly concerned with such minute linguistic details
and wonder if it has the potential to eventually get me in trouble with other people.

Probably.

One-Liners

Clearing out some stuff in order to perform an exorcism upon the Kimmel Gene, I've
been sorting my many notebooks and have come across some philosophical and/or poetic
pieces worthy of pride.

(Note: The Kimmel Gene is a family term, referring to the familiar tendency to hoard.)







The things you love aren't real at all.

I wish you could see the world through my eyes.

How can I trust you when I can't find the ground?








In other news, if I weren't such a tactile person, I would consider hiring a typist
to archive everything I've ever written in any of my many notebooks.

But that would be completely unsatisfying because of my kinesthetic learning style,
as well as my ever-increasing OCD tendencies, which would have to be largely ignored
since much of what I have written, I failed to notate with a date including the year.

http://www.learning-styles-online.com/overview/






In other news, I really am beginning to realize the style of writing I most prefer.
I like the rhythm that's created when I write a run-on sentence and read it too fast
in my head. There's a place past run-ons that sounds like mewithoutyou and, if I
don't reach it, at least Flobots.

This explains why I use too many words. Too many? No such thing!

Very Old Short Story (so far)

_____This short story is based upon a dream. According to the notebook where I began to write it, I did so on February 16. I began writing it before I had realized my composition dates required the year to be included. I began writing it back during the time I did not capitalize my sentences.
_____I had not finished writing it because I thought the general concept of the story was far too ridiculous to even take seriously. I am now determined to finish it and I hope the years that have passed have not eroded the memory beyond repair.

_____I apologize greatly for any blatant errors or examples of terrible writing syntax that are certainly evident in this piece. As far as I can tell, it was written February of 2004. This is only the roughest of drafts, copied straight from the notebook, so it will be edited before I continue with the plot. It greatly excites me when I see obvious similarities between this and more recent writing of mine. I know it's weird; just think how I must have felt after I dreamed this! Oh, and that blank space in the first section after "passionately"? That's actually how it was written in my notebook. Apparently I didn't know how to write about kissing. lol.

____________________________________________________________________________________


_____It was a beautiful day. Bright, sunny, and cheerful, she decided to go down to the beach. As she traveled along the shoreline, she noticed a man sitting under an umbrella and almost fully clothed. He certainly was out of place on the warm beach. Although she was extremely curious, she kept walking. As she went past, she had the feeling that he was staring right at her. She felt his eyes penetrating her body. She was young and very beautiful. She shuddered at the thought that he might be a stalker. She quickened her step and continued for a little while more when she decided to turn back. She had forgotten all about the man under the umbrella until he was within sight. She tried to force herself not to look at him, but he was so unusual. She kept her eyes locked on the lifeguard chair in front of her, but he was looking at her again. He seemed to be studying her, as if she was important to him, as if she was what he was looking for. She closed her eyes and hoped for her safety, but something was calling her to him. She glanced at him and his eyes met hers. She immediately looked away. She didn’t know what he wanted or what his problem was, but she had to find out. Against her better judgment, she steered herself toward him. She thought a trace of pleasure flashed across his face, but she convinced herself it was just an illusion. As she continued toward him, she attempted to gather her thoughts. But as she studied him, all sense and logic escaped her. He appeared older and looked as if life had treated him unfairly. She blinked away the wave of compassion that had struck her as she started to speak to him. He smiled, almost cynically, and all words stopped.
_____What’s wrong with me? He’s just some perverted hobo sitting on the beach. Why in the world did I approach him?... she thought. He looked as if he wanted to stand to greet her, but somehow she knew that he could not. She kneeled in the sand and brought herself to his level.
_____“You’re perfect.” He smiled. She felt herself blush as she was flattered, even though she should have been frightened. “You’re absolutely perfect.” He leaned forward. “I need someone to support me in everything I do. Someone young and beautiful and confident and smart and you’re perfect.” She was flattered. “I need someone to back me up. I need you. I need you to help me…” She was puzzled. “…with this.” He pulled up his pant leg, showing his twisted leg that had been mangled by some disease. She winced. “It’s fine. It doesn’t hurt me, but it makes life all the more difficult. I’m sure you know how hard life is to begin with.” She did. Somehow, he had seen through her sky-blue eyes to see her past, filled with pain.
_____“There’s only one way to fix this.” He pointed to his leg. “And I’ve found it. I know you’re trustworthy and now I need you to trust me. I need you to follow me and support me.” She nodded. He started to stand, but it looked like he wouldn’t make it. She stood and offered to help him. He refused. He slowly succeeded and he then looked deep into her eyes. She didn’t know what it was about him, but she felt herself falling in love. She did not care about his outer self or his looks or his age. There was something more important inside. As she finally composed herself to speak, she studied his light hazel eyes. She leaned close and confided, “I don’t know what’s happened, but I don’t care. I love you and I always will. I’ll follow you anywhere and I’ll do anything.” He put his hands on her waist and moved toward her. She grew tense for a moment, drew back, but then relaxed and let him advance as she started to long for his kiss. When his lips finally met hers, she passionately _________. He drew her to himself and she leaned on his embrace.

_____They pulled apart and he took her hand as he started to walk along the beach. They continued to the very end of all the swimming areas when he stopped. She looked at him questioningly as he turned toward the open ocean. She didn’t understand what he was doing so she turned to him, turned his head with her hand, and kissed him again, He smiled a smile that told her everything would be fine. She swallowed her nervousness as he stepped toward the water. He kept walking, even as the waves washed over his shoes. She let go of his hand when she realized he wasn’t going to stop. He turned his head and encouraged her to keep going as he continued. She watched as the man she loved walked out to sea. When she remembered her promise, she forced herself to follow him. He slowed and waited for her, as if he knew she was far too scared to keep walking alone. She was confused, yet she trusted him. She hurried to catch up as he waited patiently. When she was beside him, she took his hand and they both started walking. She began to speculate what his magnificent healing plan was. Was he planning to drown himself? Or was there something beyond her imagination that she didn’t understand? She dreadfully hoped that his solution did not involve death. When she forced herself to stop thinking about it and stop assuming things she didn’t know, she realized he had stopped. “We’re here,” he said, “Are you ready?” She began to ask for what, but before she could, he dove under the water. She didn’t know what was happening, she didn’t know what he was thinking, she didn’t know where he had gone, and she didn’t have any idea what she had gotten herself into. She shook her head, ashamed of ignoring her better judgment, as she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and gracefully dove down. Expecting to run into the bottom, she opened her eyes. She thought the salt water would burn her eyes, but for some reason it didn’t. As she adjusted to the dim light under the water, she saw a bright blue glow straight in front of her in the distance. And a little ways ahead, she saw a figure swimming toward the glow. She knew she wouldn’t be able to catch up to him, so she instinctively shouted “Wait!” The blurry shape stopped moving and turned around. She recognized his friendly face and he started swimming toward her. Now that she wasn’t alone, she breathed a sigh of relief. She stopped suddenly as she realized she was able to breathe underwater and that she had been for some time.

_____She didn’t know what was happening to her and she started to hyperventilate. When he saw that she was struggling to accept what was changing, he rushed to her side at a speed that she knew was humanly impossible, especially with his disability. He told her that everything would be fine if she just trusted him and that they’d be fine if they just stayed together. She knew that, but she couldn’t force herself to believe what was happening. Seeing that she was still unsure, he drew her close in an embrace that settled her deepest fears and doubts. She took a few deep breaths and made herself think that it was always this way and that she just hadn’t accepted it. This way, she could swallow her unsureity [sic] and follow him through whatever approached her. He invited her to keep following him as he began to swim toward the blue glow. As he pulled away, she did not move. He turned back to her and asked if she was okay. She nodded, as she quickly began toward the same blue.
_____When they were closer to the blue light, she could see the faint outline of a complex city-like structure. She immediately thought that this man had found Atlantis and she laughed at the notion. The idea that they had both lost their minds. She began to think that that theory made the most sense. As she shook the silliness that had entered her mind far away from her, she realized that they had stopped right at the edge of the glowing blue abyss.
_____“Are you ready?” he questioned. Again, she wanted to ask for what, but she wisely answered with a simple yes. He assured her that they would all love her, just as much as he did. She frantically said, “They? Who are they?” He put his hands on her shoulders. “Don’t worry, they’re just like me.” Even though she was still confused, hoping to forget all that she didn’t know, she leaned forward and kissed him. “Everything will be fine; trust me.” And she did trust him, but she was still afraid. He took her hand and he stepped into the blue light. He seemed to instantly change, but she did not know into what. He was swept over by a wash of blue color, but there was something else different. She figured that the only way to find out was to follow him, so she closed her eyes and moved forward. She then realized that whatever changed him would change her as well, but she thought of that too late and when she opened her eyes the changes that she saw in him had to be the same as the changes she felt in herself. He asked if she was okay and his face was the last thing she saw before all went black.

_____Her head throbbed with the blank memory of what had happened. She tried to blink away the pain, but it just wouldn’t go away. She sat halfway up and saw a tall, blue figure that was unfamiliar. He spoke to another behind him saying, “She’s up. You better come here. She doesn’t look too good.” She laid back down and tried to convince herself it was all a dream, but memories of the beach and a blue haze and that familiar face that she loved told her otherwise and it was all too real.
_____A strong hand gently touched her shoulder as a beloved voice urged her to wake up. She slowly opened her eyes to see his face, which was the same, yet vastly different. He put his arm behind her back and lifted her up. “You’re okay, right?” She nodded. She was confused and dazed and very much out of it, but this was the choice she had made and, whatever exactly that entailed, she had to endure it.

____________________________________________________________________________________